The entire procedure is so stressful and time-consuming that it makes us wonder if it is really worth it. If this is what it takes to find a mate, I’d almost rather be single.

Movies and television have tricked us into thinking dating is fun and exciting. Maybe you will spend the evening in a deep, meaningful conversation and time will fly by. Perhaps your companion will be a regular comedian and you will be in stitches all night long. Or maybe the person sitting across from you will be so pleasing to look at it won’t matter what they say, so visually engaged are you. On television, people come home from dates gushing to roommates about the wonderful time they had and how it must be love. Sadly, most real-life dates are veiled in a cloud of insufferable awkwardness.

But for personal reasons, I hate it even more. To me dating is like and excruciatingly long job interview, for a position you really want, only with more emotions. You are essentially trying to figure out whether or not this person is worthy of being part of your life. Are they appropriately educated? What are their personal interests and goals? Do they match yours? The difference, of course, is that interviewers get to look at the interviewees’ résumés before they meet. The whole process would surely be easier if while exchanging phone numbers and email addresses, we also exchanged CVs. Seriously. “It might actually help”.

Being a man, I hate standing around looking for signs that a woman is “approachable”. I hate going through the animalistic rituals of getting her attention, of “making a good impression” and of setting up the first date. While in the early stages of a dating relationship, I hate the constant uncertainty, the never knowing what the other person is thinking, the “when is too soon to call, I don’t want to scare her away by being too eager” routine. What I’d really like to do is just wake up one morning, turn my head and find a reasonably attractive, very intelligent wife has appeared overnight, and just stick with her the rest of my life.

But of course that’s not going to happen. So what are my alternatives? To continue functioning in a farcical ritual that I find unpleasant and am convinced does not work? Or is there another way to find a mate without having to deal with the rituals of courtship?

Well, for me the only alternative to dating is a well arranged marriage. Only early marriage can help us on campus where girls almost go naked with no shame. Explain to your parents and avoid wasting your time, money, and dignity on a person who will not marry you. If you fornicate instead of marriage you will surely regret it both in this world and the next.

Most people look for love but unfortunately most people they love never love them back so they wind up lusting after them. Love finds you but you can always lust for some thing……

Premarital sex will cause you a great regret in your life! A lady wrote this to me: “I have been going out with my boyfriend for a year and 8 months. We are both 18. When we first started going out I enjoyed sex a lot more–probably because it was new to me. I liked for the first year we were going out. Now I HATE it. I have literally turned into such a prude and I don’t know why! I feel so uncomfortable and “dirty” having sex nowadays. I feel disgusting afterwards because I just do it to make him happy. I hate talking about sex, I don’t like thinking about it, and I really dislike doing it. I am NEVER EVER horny and it makes me really resent it when my boyfriend is (and he is every day). He is starting to get frustrated and always offers to make me “happy” first. But when he touches me I feel no good sensations. It’s just irritating. I want my old sex drive back! I used to love sex! Now since I feel no pleasure from it, it has become something horrible to avoid…” So do you still think you can satisfy your boyfriend/girlfriend with PREMARITAL SEX? Don’t try it. And if you are already in it, STOP IT.

Sex is an act created by God wherein a MAN exhibits and celebrates his love for his WOMAN. There are many reasons why you should not engage in sex and they add up to one thing: what you gain by sex before marriage is not worth what you lose by it.  What do you gain?  A brief thrill, perhaps some momentary pleasure, but what you lose can affect your entire life.

There are so many practical reasons why it is not OK!  Asides from the very glaring reasons (being hazardous because of veneral diseases etc), others are:

* It can ruin your chances of knowing real love: a girl makes a tragic mistake when she tries to gain love or hold on to it by giving sex. Real love may lead to engagement, marriage and sex but sex does NOT lead to real love.

* It can keep you from ever knowing God’s best: one of the wrong ideas concerning sex is that it is just a physical thrill to be enjoyed with whomever you choose. This makes it cheap and meaningless and disregards certain facts about how we are made.  It is such intimate experiences that a part of you remains forever with the other person and when you marry you find that you can never give 100% of your self to your mate. WHY? Because a part of you has been given to others.

* It will hurt your self esteem: a young person’s purity is his/her priceless possession.  Sometimes a girl is love hungry and she mistakes a boy’s sex desire for the love she is looking for and gives in.  All too often the boy does not really love her or respect her as a person.  He wants it, she is available and he uses her to get wants. She is like bargain table goods – “slightly soiled: greatly reduced in price.” She has no where to go in her search for love but to another boy who is looking for sex.  She becomes cheap in her own eyes and in the eyes of others.

* Fools you into marrying the wrong person.

* Can ruin your marriage: it greatly reduces your chances of a happy marriage. One reason is that those who play around with sex before marriage tend to do the same thing after marriage.  They are never satisfied – always looking for a new thrill.

* You may contract STDs! What are STDs?

STDs are infections that people usually get by having sex with someone who already has one. Some STDs can be treated and cured with antibiotic medicine. Others cannot be cured.

After all practical reasons, one reason more important than all these is that premarital sex is wrong (not OK)! Because God says it is wrong and nothing can change that. So then, I say no.

You cannot claim to love a lady and still want her to sin against her Creator.  If you should have sex with her, will that love continue the way it was before you made love to her?  “No“.  There is nothing as good as patience. Love is patient. If you love your partner you will have to wait after all you will still enjoy it till the day you die. So, why the rush?

Let’s tweak the topic a bit.

What about kissing…….

Let’s move it up…Fondling and caressing

Let’s take it up one more step to the tip…. oral sex

Nil the while no real sex (penetration etc)…no SEX

Where exactly do we draw the line?

If you let the breast rest upon the chest, before it is best, you may miss rest.

If your being back with him, will make him ask for your back, why not back out, so you don’t back your destiny.

Why exert a measure of pleasure, to enjoy pleasure at your leisure, only to lose your treasure.

If you discover her and uncover her, thinking you are covered, you will soon be discovered and you may never recover from what you will suffer.

Why mess the bed when you should rest, if it will bend you to miss the best of rest.

Hmmm oro agba!  Avoid all appearance of evil.

Not just the evil, but its appearance (fondling and caressing)

(Forget the rhymes, dwell on the meaning)

Sex is sex. Penetration or no penetration. What do you call the smooching and fondling and the rest of it? Seems to me that some of us are simply being deliberately hypocritical. Premarital sex is complete bullshit rubbish.  Kissing, fondling, caressing, oral sex, etc.  I’d say all these are not pre-marital sex but they lead to it. So if you are avoiding premarital sex, all this must be avoided too, because it’s you who says, “no penetration” that will end up kissing, caressing and fondling your {way} into it.

And you know what?  I have respect for a lady that despite fooling around is able to keep the yeye ‘boyfriend’ from sticking his _____ ___ ___ ______ (“penetration”).  I don’t know why, but I just have that respect for them: they may not have morals, at least they have willpower!